I could have done it so many times now. So many opportunities. So many perfect and silent opportunities. Why can't I just do it? Why is it so hard? Is it supposed to be easy? I don't know the answers, I suppose. I asked for advice and I got it... I just don't know. I've never known about this and right now it's scary. I think about it all the time. I think about how and when and why or why not. I think about how perfect it could be or how it shouldn't be perfect or planned out at all. With this much thought it's got to be real, right? I know the answer to that. Sooner or later. I don't stick to plans so I won't plan on soon. I do hope for it, though.
I will be happy when that day comes. ....I'm telling myself I will be and that it will be okay. More than okay.
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